Written by Freelancing Writer and Editor : Olayinka Sodiq
Sometimes a friend may be going through a difficult phase, could be the death of a parent, depression, anxiety issues, or a transition, having a child, that prevent them from being there for you, even if the friendship seems a little off-balanced.
It’s necessary to have a distinction between what might be a brief, understandable phase where you should still hang in there for the person versus a longer-term issue that means that the friendship may not be a good fit for you.
If you harbor a friend who is a negative or toxic force in your life, how do you deal with that situation with them?
Know if you should end a friendship
Strong friendships should always have a healthy give and take, it may not always be a 50-50 split, but there should be some semblance of balance. If this friend is too demanding of your time, attention and support and doesn’t offer the same in return, it is an indication that it’s time to move on.
“You feel exhausted by the idea of just hanging out,” “Or you don’t feel like seeing them when you used to feel excited or Maybe they’re engaging in behaviors that are against your morality, you certainly don’t need that in your Life.
Also, pay attention to how you feel when you receive a text from this friend or when they reach out to make plans, If you get anxious or a “sinking feeling,” that could also be a sign of incompatibility.
The simple fact is that friendships don’t last forever which is perfectly fine; no one is suggesting you discard friends over minor squabbles, but you certainly can permit yourself to move on when the relationship no longer serves you.
“You don’t need to stay friends with anyone who does not have your ideology or walking the same path as you or lifting you while you’re striving to accomplish your goals.”
How to break it off with a friend
A slow fade, often regarded as a callous move, but permissible in the context of a friendship, It’s unnecessary to let the friend know that you want to break up with them.
A slow decline in seeking them out is enough for them to get the message “Think of a tennis match when it comes to the way you communicate with your friend. Allow them to hit two balls in your court before you hit one back, and slowly send the message of unavailability.
Repairing a relationship requires airing your grievances; give specific reasons why you’re not making an effort to spend time together anymore, “White lies like, ‘I’m focused on work and hobbies and haven’t had much time for all my friends lately’ are fine.” “Just let them know that you’re feeling, you have outgrown each other, and it’s better for everyone if you just stay in touch periodically,” “Be prepared, though, that they might feel hurt or angry, so having a script in your mind about how to handle that will help you navigate it.”
Keep in mind that a slow fade is a lot different from suddenly cutting off contact with this person — effectively ghosting them.
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