Written by Freelancing Writer and Editor : Olayinka Sodiq

Why would you choose to be with someone who isn’t excited to be with you? Think about this for a moment: There’s a grey area in dating that a lot of people get hung up on, an area where feelings are debatable, or one person’s attitude is stronger than the other.  A lot of dating advice exist only to solve those grey areas for people.


Derek Sivers once wrote, “If I’m not saying ‘Hell Yeah!’ to something, then I say no.” I want to apply it to the dating world. And because I’m more of a sophisticated asshole than Derek is, I’ll call mine The Law of “Fuck Yes or No.” which states that before you get involved with someone new, in whatever capacity, you should be inspired by them to say “Fuck Yes” for you to proceed.” The “Fuck Yes or No” law also implies that both parties must be spirited about the prospect of each other’s company.

They may sound a bit idealistic to a few people. But the Fuck Yes or No law has lots of benefits in your life when it comes to dating:

  1. Do not be strung along by people who are not into you. End the wishing and hoping as well as all the headaches. Become the rejector, not rejected. Start practicing self-respect.
  2. Do not pursue people you are so-so on for ego purposes.
  3. Consent issues should settle immediately.
  4. Establish and enforce firm personal boundaries.
  5. Always know your position with the other person.

 The Law of “Fuck Yes or No” applies to date, sex, relationships, even friendships.

The point is: both of you need to be fuck yes about crucial issues, or you are wasting time.

But the true beauty of The Law of “Fuck Yes or No” is that it makes the problem simple in your dating life. While applying the Law of “Fuck Yes or No,” there are only two problems that could occur. The first problem is that people who never feel a “Fuck Yes” for anybody they meet

The other problem is people who do not meet others who feel a “Fuck Yes” for them. If the people you pursue give you outright rejections, then it’s time to focus on improving yourself.

And this is the ultimate dating advice lesson — man, woman, gay, straight, trans, furry, whatever — the only real dating advice is self-improvement. Everything else is a distraction.

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